Archives for posts with tag: army

Guys,

A friend of a friend, and a fellow Army family needs our help. Jen has battled and beaten cancer before, but her doctors have just discovered that it is back, and have given her 3-6months to live. When J told me, I stopped breathing, and my heart ached for them. Jen is Canadian and would like to go home with Scott (her husband), and their 4 beautiful sons. I’m asking for your help, however small or large, to support his Army family through their darkest hour. A mycause page has been set up for the family to help them raise the money to get them to Canada, and to pay for medical bills.

I’m not sure what else to say here. I don’t really know the Fitzgibbin family; we have seen each other at the birthday parties of our mutual friend’s children, and I have sat next to Jen at a gun salute; so I don’t want to pretend that I know them, or what they’re going through. All I’m going to say is that my heart hurts for her and their family, and for our mutual friend who I know loves her so much. I wanted to do something to help, and this blog gets a steady, albeit small, stream of hits, so I hope sharing will help them reach their goal. So if you can, please help me support this beautiful family.

Thanks guys

https://www.mycause.com.au/page/84618/loveforthefitzgibbins

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after two bonus weeks, SB left for field. I could get really upset, angry, or annoyed at it all, but instead I choose to see the funny sides…let me explain…

for the past couple of weeks, we were told, ‘you’ll probably go tomorrow’…everyday. haha so each day, we prepared for it to be our last. we made no future plans, we were nicer to each other (lol), and we both looked at the phone expectantly every time it rang. Then the same people who kept saying ‘tomorrow’ (I assume), said they didn’t think he would go at all; so we started to relax in to SB being home. It was about this time, when we were making plans for Territory day, and I started to think that maybe he would be here for my birthday (today), that the phone rang…

hahahahahahaha (I just have to stop and giggle at myself)

of course, it was this one time that I did not look at the phone, SB didn’t even answer it, that we got the message that he was on a flight in 12 hours. so I suppose the lesson here is beware when you relax and plan (even if it’s only 1 day in advance, haha, I will never ask “what should we do tomorrow” again!)

I originally started to think about the weird, ironic, silly things that this life makes me do though, when I hopped in the shower at 10:30pm to shave my legs. it’s like a reflex; SB: “i’m going field”, Me: “then I must shave my legs!”. what other lives lead to frantic de-fuzzing in the middle of the night? love it

So instead of being upset that I missed the fireworks, and I’m alone on my birthday, and my legs are now prickly again, I will giggle at all the weird, ironic and silly things, take every dog lick as a birthday present and enjoy the fact that I don’t have to shave my legs again for at least 3 weeks if I don’t want to. hahaha

xxx

I am writing from my newly connected-to-the-internet computer! yippee!

I wanted to write about something else today, but after receiving some less-than-impressed comments on Lesson #27, I feel like I need to write this one.

Since starting this blog, I have received both lovely, and nasty comments. I’ve addressed the negative comments, told you I need a thicker skin (which I still haven’t gotten),and tried to defend myself. The main theme seems to be, ‘when you’ve been an Army wife for more than five minutes, then you can have a say’.

I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again; I have never presented this blog as THE guide to Army wife life. The lessons are not ones I want to teach you, they are ones I have learnt myself. If someone benefits from reading this, that is great! But every single experience, whether it’s shared by a newbie like me, or a WAG who’s been in for 30 years, is going to be different. I’m not putting myself on their level either; of course they know more than me, I’m just trying to point out, that I am simply sharing my own experience, and just because it’s newer, doesn’t mean it is less valid. It’s a story, not a textbook.

Which brings me to what was actually supposed to be the point of this post (before I went off on a tangent, but I do that…frequently. hehe); you actually don’t have to remind me that I’m new to this! I know it may come as a surprise to some of you, but I am actually painfully aware of how ‘fresh’ I am to all of this. Everything, is new and different. I am faced with that ‘new girl’ feeling every single day, so don’t you worry, I’m not in danger of forgetting anytime soon. haha

That’s not to say that I am miserable though. I’m actually really enjoying learning everything, all of the new experiences, and the feeling of accomplishment when I can drive to the shops without a map! That is the point of this blog. To savour, and share the ‘newness’ of it all.

So the next time you want to say ‘when you’ve been an Army WAG for more than five minutes…’, remember that I already know that (plus, it’s been at least 20 minutes! hehe)

xxx

…did you miss me?

what a CRAZY few weeks it has been! I will give you a summary, in dot points (it may be boring)…

  • packed up
  • SB came home
  • said goodbyes
  • dropped Lando at the dog-sitters
  • got in the car
  • saw my best friend in Biloela : )
  • drove
  • drove
  • drove
  • drove
  • drove
  • arrived in Darwin
  • chilled by the pool at our resort while SB went to work
  • saw our house
  • arranged electricity, internet, phone, spouse ID’s, etc
  • found out that SB was going field
  • checked out what Darwin has to offer in the way of shopping (very little)
  • checked out some restaurants (since our hotel room didn’t have a kitchen)
  • moved into our house
  • unpacked
  • unpacked
  • unpacked
  • SB packed for field
  • picked up Lando from the airport
  • dropped SB at the airport

now I am sitting here dealing with licence and university dramas…

my question to you, which I’ll go into more later, is how do you make friends/meet people, especially when you don’t have kids or a job? your tips?

until next time…

I’m loving having stuff to write about again! (can you tell? haha)

So today was the Toll walk through (that’s when Toll (the movers) send someone to look at all your stuff, work out how many boxes you need, answer questions, etc). The lady was really nice, and it was pretty quick and painless…

…except for the kitchen. I asked her about my cupboard full of accumulated food; we’re talking hundreds of dollars; it’s all the little things you don’t think about, like spices, flour, that old can of tomatoes. All that stuff in your pantry – what do you do with it?

So she tells me that I can’t take anything liquid (because it could spill all over everything).

a pained expression comes onto my face, she notices my distress – she probably assumes it’s because I have an entire bar sitting there (vodka, gin, tequila, vermouth, etc)…but no…my pain is coming from my hot sauce bottle.

I am American. One of the only things I miss (besides cheaper shopping, snow, and fall football games) is the food.

Last year I discovered USAFoods – it’s heaven sent, they have pretty much all of the things I miss. I cannot believe how many more options in food America has! Probably a good thing we don’t live there, or I would be SUPER fat.

Anyway, so along with awesome copycat recipes I found on Pinterest, I can have my favorite restaurant food – Sticky Fingers.

They are literally the greatest thing EVER, but they require my friend Frank; Franks hot sauce. I was going through so much of this stuff (because it should be added to every single meal), I bought a 1gallon jug of it – greatest purchase ever!

 so back to the story…

I have 1 gallon of my beloved Frank’s hot sauce sitting in my cupboard, and she’s telling me I can’t pack liquids…

…so I ask, “can I bring Frank (yes, I referred to it as a him) with us in the car? I really cannot go without my hot sauce”

I’m not sure if her reaction was actual amusement, or uncomfortable, this-girl-is-crazy, no-sudden-movements kind of amusement, but if she had tried Frank, she would have understood.

So Frank will be roadtripping with us – which in the end is really great, because we can add him to all of our crappy roadtrip food!

Another guest will be joining us on the journey…more about him later

xxx

ps. I really encourage you all to buy some Frank’s, because it is the greatest thing ever…and it does come in smaller bottles for the less enthused partakers. 

I couldn’t sleep last night. My brain refused to turn off, and thus, I did not sleep. At 6 this morning I decided to try again – success!

3 hours later, my phone starts assaulting me in my sleep, I answer, sounding like I’ve just been woken up.

“hello, I’m Nikki your toll case manager, I just need to ask you a few questions”

“oh good morning, how are you” I manage through my fog. At this point I’m quickly trying to get it together…I knew this call would come eventually and I am determined to get Nikki to like me, this relationship, this phone call, is important!

“oh I’m sorry, did I wake you?” see, now Nikki thinks I am a lazy trophy wife who lounges around all day sleeping. Excellent first impression.

“oh no please don’t mind me, its totally reasonable for you to have called at 9am, most normal people are up and rararring (father of the bride) to go by now, my stupid brain simply wouldn’t shut down last night”. That is what I wanted to reply to Nikki, but in my sleepy haze, it was more like “oh it’s fine”, she probably added ” I do it all the time” to the end of my sentence in her mind.

she then asked me a few questions, and I managed to remember a couple of mine, which I managed to ask in an EXTREMELY bumbling and stumbling way – my brain needed to reboot during sleep, so it kept totally freezing as I tried to remember such simple words like car, or husband. It was painful.

then the stupidest of all things occurred…Nikki mentions something about only reimbursing us for time Lando spends at the babysitters, as long as we are staying in accommodation they’ve arranged. Then we discuss how many days it will take to get to Darwin – they budget around 8, we’re doing it in 5. We actually hang up, but then my stupid brain has a thought…

if they think we are on the road for day 6,7, and 8, they won’t have arranged temporary accommodation for those nights! I call Nikki back…

“we are actually planning on driving it in 5 days, so do you need to know this so that our accommodation in Darwin will be booked as of when we arrive?”

something, something, health and safety, something, something, you arrange your own accommodation during the drive so you can arrange a place in Darwin the last few days”. There; it’s complete – now Nikki has a vision of me as a lazy and stupid trophy wife.

of course! Gah how embarrassing! If they are paying for 8 nights of accommodation, that we arrange ourselves, of course we should simply arrange some in Darwin, whenever we may arrive there. My brain isn’t working…in fact, this post may make absolutely no sense! Haha

so the lesson I learnt is to always have your questions written down so you can cover everything in one, clearly pronounced conversation, and you don’t have to call back to ask illogical questions that potentially alienate your toll case manager. Lol

yippee!

today it arrived…our DHA log on! I immediately threw my assignment to one side and opened up HomeFind like it was a bag of potato chips (salt & vinegar of course).

I’ve been waiting for this day for so long! We’ve never really had a house of our own, and I was SO excited to get one!

As I was looking at the 5 houses, which we never could have afforded in Brisbane (let alone Darwin, where I hear rent is astronomical), I couldn’t help focusing on how incredibly lucky we are!

What an amazing perk! Not only does my husband get to do a job he LOVES, but they give (at a reduced rent, not free, unfortunately, lol) us a house!

The other thing that struck me, is how much I’ve come to love my baby, Lando. Thanks to Lando, we qualified for houses we probably wouldn’t have otherwise qualified for – I thanked Lando for his contribution to our family by choosing a house with an awesome looking yard and a big undercover area he can live under when the wet season arrives.

The house has these UGLY vinyl floors, but I actually kind of love them; probably because it’s a house, so I’m too excited to be picky. But it might also be because the first few apartments that my parents had when they got married had so-ugly-it’s-amusing floors as well! It feels like some sort of tradition.

This step makes it feel so much more real! I have an address, a neighbourhood, a home!

Now here’s hoping that something doesn’t go wrong and they make me choose another one, I’m quite attached to my ugly floors already!

xxx

Limbo is coming to an end and I see a very busy month approaching. SB finishes IETs on the 30th of this month, that’s 22 days away! Last week, we finally got told where we are going; ready? Drumroll….

Darwin!

Now of course this isn’t ‘for sure’ yet, but I kind of think the Army never gives you a ‘for sure’, that I’ll know it’s ‘for sure’ when we are standing in our Darwinian home.

When we first got the unofficial orders, my heart sank, and I realised just how much I had been holding onto the hope that we would get to stay in Brisbane. Reality set in and I realised that this was it, we are actually moving away from our family and friends, to be a real military family, in a place I’ve never been to. The fear set in.

Then the researching began. I asked my blogettes about living there, and looked at basically every website I could think of. The fear started to morph into excitement! I will miss my family, a lot, but I’m so excited to start this next step; to meet new people, experience a new place, make a new life.

I’m certainly not the first person to have to move away from what they know, and I truely believe that how this experience goes is entirely up to us, and the attitudes we approach it with…

…so bring on Darwin!

When I started this blog, I promised to be honest, to write about things even though they may be, in this case, a little risque, hehe. So nana, and any other family reading, you should probably skip this one. Right now, I’m wishing I had written this blog totally anonymously, haha but the post must go on.

There are so many things that go into building a healthy relationship. When you are together, one of those no-brainer factors is physical intimacy. It’s a fantastic, and important part of relationships, but it gets taken away when our soldiers are gone. We get so caught up, in the limited time we have to talk, with updating them on what’s going on, what the kids (or dog in my case) is up to, how they are doing, that flirting (and more) get pushed to the bottom of our priorities.

Each couple is different, and will have to choose for themselves how to go about dealing with distimacy (that would be distance + intimacy, hehe). Some couples will choose to completely eliminate sexuality from their conversations, others will go full-on pornographic, haha, to each their own.

What’s most important is not feeling embarrassed by wanting to introduce some distimacy. Sure it may not have ever crossed your mind to send a naked photo to your husband before, I know it didn’t ever cross my mind, but we aren’t a normal couple who sees each other everyday anymore. When you are together, you don’t have to send a photo, or a text, or an email, or a video, or even a letter, because they’re right there in front of you, but as Army Wives, we have to get creative ;).

I always considered sexting to be something reserved for pathetic, trashy, attention-seeking teenagers (like my teen self), not respectable, committed wives. Then I realised (as I had to choose how much distimacy to introduce into our own marriage), that trust and commitment are what set my sexting apart from 16 year old sexting. I know that my husband isn’t going to show his buddies, and rumours aren’t going to spread around school. I know that sending a photo to him isn’t about attention or getting him to like me (he already does!), it’s about maintaining that precious bond that intimacy brings to a relationship.

Now, obviously, I don’t know how this will change (and I’m sure it will change), once SB is deployed overseas. Less communication, and less medias for communication will, I’m sure, limit the options for distimacy even more, but we’ll write that post when we get to it.

I would love to hear what you think!

xxx